Freedom Through Words

It is inevitable that too many things happen all at once with a rate seemingly faster than the speed of sound. What frustrates me the most is that I do not know which I should do and write first. It really frustrates me when I am not able to express myself that much. It is like a suffocating feeling that when you realize how much you want to put everything in words but then, you just cannot.
You got what it takes to write them all down. The words are there right inside your mind. The words are so eager to get out and be typewritten. But then, it is never too easy how to solidify such words. I have been feeling a lot of rollercoaster emotions lately and it is such a shame to never have the chance to write them all down. But for now, I want to change this.
It's 2013 and I hope to change myself. I may be too busy because of my life as a Biology student but I wish to post at least an entry every month. This is I really promise. Because I know, just by the act of putting everything into words will let me become free.

The Return and The Anxiety

It has almost been a year since the last time I've written something here. It feels so odd that it feels like a million years ago has passed since then. I feel bad because I have let all of the countless happenings and events take away my need for writing. I swear regret is washing me up right now for I have failed to record so many cherished moments. Even my journal is not that alive anymore.
The past semesters of being a Biology student drained my time and energy to even think about writing. I am not sure if writing is my passion but right now, I really feel anxious because it seems like I have lost an eternity not being able to express my thoughts in this wild an unworldly imagination of mine. Though I never fail to write daily about my whereabouts and other daily events in my black 2012 planner, it is still so different to just have some quiet time, sit down, hold the pen, or in tonight's case, type on the keyboard as specks of thoughts flow and transform into more concrete matter, words and phrases.
I believe after writing this post, I would feel a lot better for I have somehow expressed a little part of me. This just proves that I am never a person of strong conviction through spoken words but through written ones. Hm. Thanks to my very active social networking site, Twitter, where I could just tweet almost everything that comes to my mind. Needless to say that it is totally all right even if it would seem like I am only talking to myself. My Twitter friends could read it but they can just ignore it, too, which is also perfectly all right for me, too. :) Only a few people know but I really do not like being the center of attraction. Eek. I dreaded that ever since.
Many things have happened today and as usual, I intend to write every single moment which is quite impossible. But since I have started writing again, I might as well try, right? In my mind, I'm thinking of making a love story blog and a blog of my life as a Biology student. Hmm. Those thoughts would require a lot of effort and time to realize. Anyway, who says we do extraordinary things in life as super easy? True people with true experiences would never believe that. 

I guess I might end this with a goodnight now. :*

No Weekend

Yes! The week is almost finished and it's weekend! Should I feel happy and relaxed now? The answer is NO. I can't. Yes, I know it's unfortunate but I'm so loaded with things to do. The biggest things on line are my two Bio 31L Lab Reports on Cells and Physical Properties of the Protoplasm due on Monday. Ugh~ Great.

But by looking on the brighter side, it's okay because I'm having so much fun preparing wet mounts, examining them under our light compound microscope, and drawing them exactly as how they appeared to be. This is just so great. I must also be quite happy and contented that I only have four school days in a week. No Wednesdays and Saturdays. That's quite relaxing sometimes. :)

What's more relaxing, too, is that despite that I'm an all-around busy girl, I still get to spend some lovely time with the people I love. They're all the reasons why I'm doing all these anyway. They give me the strength to go on. I spent some time doing some crazy stuff with my best friend yesterday. My family and I watched TV together last night. And today, I'm going to watch a movie with my Mom and a dear close friend. :)

So, before I could get stressed with my panicky mannerisms and before I go to the bathroom for a bath and before I go to school for a seminar later, I might just finish even a little bit in researching for my lab report. :)

Have a good day~ :)

P.S. I really hope I could post a lot more entries from now on. :3

Pressing Thoughts

I'm supposed to write something about how my entire college life has started from surviving the First Semester to currently struggling the Second Semester. But in just a span of few weeks, school works are pressing on me so hard that ineffective time management would only leave me panting to tiredness.

I wanted to write and jot down everything that's happening right now but the inevitable truth is that time moves so fast. We must go with it or lose yourself in the middle of your own chaos. Well, some people may easily and effortlessly get through their own chaotic worlds but unfortunately, I'm not one of them. I'm the type of a person who gets easily distracted. I can't even overcome my forgetfulness and clumsiness. Ugh~

But, I'm really going to post them all if I could find this weekend or next week. I'll be so okay then. It's because I really wanna express my feelings out and the only effective thing to do is by updating this blog.

I also started my own story blog which will be published soon. I hope you'll all look forward to it because it's the blog about letters of a girl to her soulmate. I'm gonna give a hint. It's actually entitled "Dear Tim McGraw" :)

Okay~ So, I still have an early 7:30 AM class tomorrow. -__-

Gotta sleep. Goodnight. :)

Change: The Only Constant Thing

Wow. I didn't know how amazing this thing now. I was just playing around with all the colors, fonts, themes, images that I've surfed throughout the Cyber Highway. Then, just look at this! A starry night blog which I totally love! And it's really making me feel bliss. :))
So, this is it then. I totally transformed my blog. This somehow interprets how much I've changed since the ISH who started the "In The Realms of My Existence." No doubt that's why it took me more than a year to take a look at this blog and express my thoughts again. I realized this blog was something I could hold on to, where I could trace the roots of who I was before. That's why I've decided to keep my blog for it has totally witnessed the big change in me.
Back in 2009, the year when I started everything, I was a whole lot different person. I could really say that. My thoughts, my feelings, my lifestyle, my home, my body, and my dreams changed. It is really true. Change is the only constant thing in the world.
Yes. It may seem unusual to think that I was like this before but without the person I was, I wouldn't be someone like me now. I wouldn't have been who I am now. I wouldn't have felt this new experiences and new feelings. The things that have happened in the past brought me here.
I couldn't help but expect more change. But at the moment, cheers to my new blog! :)

Goodnight. zzZZzz.

New Skin

Okay. I realized my blog's getting so out of time.
I have decided to change and put a new life in here. I'll be working out for some changes this upcoming week. :)
I can't wait but I gotta go sleep now. Okay, bye.

Come and Go

So, basically, it has been over a year since the last time I've posted something here. And, I haven't really realized till now how everything has changed, how things were going, and how the heck I am here at this point of my life.
Like, a year ago, I was still worrying about some little things in school. Now, I don't know. It is because I'm definitely already in college. Wheeew. Time flies so fast, eh?
And hey, you'll never really guess how everything turned around since that day, 7th of OCTOBER 2010. I have never ever thought that everything would come at this point. I have never expected that I have come to the point that I have acquired the fear of losing that someone.
Throughout the year, I could honestly say that I have learned to be more mature. I have learned a lot especially from my last year in Basic Education at my old school, my first ever school. Now, I have stepped a little bit out to see the world. I'm on my own journey now. I don't know whether the people that are dear to me now, whom I'm afraid to lose of, will still be there with me on my next pit stop in life. I guess I really am the one who's leading this adventure and those people have their own adventure stories to play, too.
I guess that doesn't really matter. What matters is that they've passed by in my life just the same as I've put a twist in theirs, but in the end, all of us would go in to the same direction anyway, the future. Just as what I just coincidentally read from a status in Facebook right now: "At some point, you have to realize that some people can stay in your heart but not in your life."
Yes. This is so true. But who really cares? Somehow, there's a big part of me which gives me the hope that I know someday, our roads will cross again. All I just have to do is to let go when it's time to let go and try to learn the art of waiting. God has special plans for us and it will always be righteous and worth enough to wait patiently.
WOW. I'm sorry for the lack of unity, coherence and emphasis for this post. It's just a free writing edition actually. I was just trying to check my writing guts and just trying to express what's boggling my mind these past few weeks. For the information of everyone, I was still writing actually but just through my own handy journal. And, believe me, it would take me a lot of time to post everything that has happened. I was also thinking of making another blog especially that I'm a whole lot different of a person now but I don't know. I'll think about it. So, I really gotta go. I feel so good after this. :)
But, I'm just gonna leave this line for now so to remind me that TRUE LOVE WAITS. <3

Love is a test. You don't have to study but you have to be patient to get it right. In the end, it's worth a passing grade. If love is true, it waits.